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beyourownkind

National Friendship Day: You Can't Make Old Friends

Updated: Nov 11

When we’re young, friendship means sleepovers, ice cream, and board games. Those were the days, right? I remember sharing those moments with my grade school friends, but as I grew older, I realized that friendship is so much more profound and enduring.


Take Kimberly, my rock and best friend since the 6th grade. For almost 30 years, she’s been my “momma bear,” always looking out for me and waving those red flags when I needed them most. Kimberly taught me the importance of being myself and standing firm in who I am. We’ve navigated grade school, high school, and college together, and her unwavering support has been a cornerstone of my life.




Derrick was the guy who asked me to be his biology partner in high school freshmen year and we have been partners since, we loved pranking each other—this guy introduced me to so much, like No Limit Records and Cherry Coke for starters. Not only did he become my best friend over the years, but my soulmate. If you haven’t figured it out by now, I’m talking about my husband. We’ve been through a lot, but it never seemed so tough as long as we got through it together.




Then there’s Asha, my best friend since my senior year of high school. We met through another friend, and even though she moved away for college, it didn’t matter—I was at her school more often than mine! Despite the ups and downs, our love and friendship have never wavered. Asha protects me, notices the intimate details about me that others often overlook, and her care is a constant source of comfort.




High school also brought me Darnell, my brother from another mother. He’s been my rock, my party partner, and the friend who tells it like it is with a gentle touch. Watching him grow into a successful attorney filled with integrity has been an honor. He’s taught me that life is short and that every day should be celebrated.




Jacynthia and I met in our freshman year of high school and reconnected as seniors, but our true bond formed in adulthood. Her sisterhood and love have been a beacon of light in my life. She checks on me at just the right times, and our long talks about goals and self-care are moments I cherish deeply. Her gentle nature and non-judgmental support are gifts I am forever grateful for.




College introduced me to Candice, Tynisha, Christa, and Maleya—friends who became eternal sisters. We lived in a 4-bedroom apartment at "The Commons," affectionately known as the "1021 crew." Our apartment was the hub of countless unforgettable memories, from pre-party gatherings to being the party itself.


Our apartment consisted of 2 bedrooms on two sides, and Tynisha and I resided on the same side. She taught me the power of silence and resilience. She was the first among us to earn her Master’s degree, balancing fun with relentless ambition.




Asha and Candice lived on the other side of our apartment. Candice and I discovered we had a shared past when she recounted a summer camp story involving a little girl stuck in a baby swing—turn out, that girl was me! That moment with Candice was insane! I tell you what, I learned my lesson, and she’s been talking me out of bad decisions ever since. From her, I learned to live out loud and be myself without apologies.




Our neighbor Jermaine is one of the most creatively talented people I know. Present-day, he pushes me to go after my dreams and not only shoot for the stars but for the planets. He’s younger than me but wise beyond his years, and although he lives on the West Coast, he makes sure to check in on me.




Maleya, who lived in the same area of The Commons, could dance like nobody’s business. Her sweet nature could melt the bitterest of hearts, and if you got on the spades table with her, you better know what you’re doing!




Christa is the youngest of the group, and like Candice, always lives out loud. I still admire her fearlessness in going after whatever she wants, and I love the woman she has grown up to be.


Chris, a couple of doors down, graced us with his Stevie Wonder-like voice. Asha used to make him sing Stevie Wonder’s "Never Dreamed You’d Leave in Summer" a lot, and I never grew tired of it. Chris is a straight shooter who will never dumb down the truth—you need people like that in your life. The 1021 crew is and will always be my tight-knit brothers and sisters, and I am grateful Asha introduced me to this fold.



Chris is the guy all the way to the left in the brown sweater. and Christa is the young lady with the black and white checkered sweater.


I could keep typing about the wonderful people I met during and after college, like Marnelle, or some work friends, like Heather, who encouraged me to go back to school, or Selia, who was always a lending ear. Recently in life, Demetria, who not only became my business manager but also a little sister. She taught me the importance of effective communication, which in turn not only saved my friendships but improved my marriage. Or Tia, whose comedy and sarcasm are unmatched. And Meosha who is filled with hard truths or Devon who is always pushing me past procrastination.


There are so many who have inspired me, taught me life lessons, or were just in my life for a good time and not a lifetime. And even if you’re not named, you know who you are, and I appreciate you more than you’ll ever know.


Friendship, I’ve learned, evolves and deepens over time. It’s about being each other’s sounding boards, celebrating milestones, and navigating life’s tumbles and curves together. These friendships have shaped who I am, and I cherish each moment and memory shared with these incredible individuals.


Here’s to the friends who become family, the ones who stand by us through thick and thin, and the lifelong bonds that only grow stronger with time.💕




Don't be Shy? Brag about your friends in the comments.

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