You've Got DMs!

Updated: Jan 28

Peacock blessed my life by making one of my all-time favorite movies, "You've Got Mail" available for me to repeatedly watch. Watching this movie took my mind back to that nostalgia type of dating that did not involve instant communication via mobile phone or passive-aggressive texting to avoid a topic. Or even AOL itself when you had to impatiently wait for the internet to wake up to see an email or an instant message.


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Since I am married, it may be unfair to compare present-day dating to the past, but, in a way, is it? I am still getting approached via DM by sugar daddies, and God knows who is on the other end. Additionally, my single friends always fill me in on the details of present-day dating. From what I gathered, dating has gone digital. Computer love has transitioned to Netflix and Chill or just pretending to be interested in a person via a dating app in hopes of getting the goods.


Social media has set some pretty unrealistic body goals for women. I am pretty sure there is a large population of women who aren't shaped like IG models. And I am learning that not all IG models are shaped like IG models; most posts are just for show.



Via IG


Social media has heightened illusions of what a mate should be and has heightened the dating standards. Honestly, if I had to date now, I would stay committed to my vibrator. I would be too anxious to meet someone on the other side of that screen not knowing their true intentions or identity. It was already scary dating when I was single so, I can imagine the creeps I could internationally pick up.


To brighten the mood, I do have some people that have met online and lived happily ever. So it is up to the people and their intentions. Yet in still, my DMs are filled with Bitcoin people and men asking me about my location and trying to potentially pimp me or me pimp them...I am not quite sure.


What is the Proper Way to Pursue Someone Online?


With anything, there is proper etiquette to pursue someone online without creeping them out. According to an article on Beyond Ages, to properly approach a dating interest online, step one is to initially view the person of interest profile, not open with a comment, and only DM when they have something of merit to say. In other words, treat this experience as you would have met this person in a physical setting. Instead of sending a DM stating, "You are so sexy," maybe send a message, "Hi, my name is blah; I would love to get to know you better." The message may still get rejected, but at least the person or you did not come off as a creepy old Chester.


Don't Be Shy. What are some respectful tactics for reaching out to someone via DM? Would you ever reach out to a stranger via DM to get to know them better? Why or Why not?

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