Updated: Aug 27
You ever wondered why your Ex was comfortable with leaving you unfulfilled during the entire relationship, just for you to later find out they are doing all the right things when in the new relationship? Upon this discovery, did you wonder if it was something about you that made you feel you were not worth the effort? But what if I told you that demise is the very thing that caused the demise? What if you are the reason they are far better partners to their new mate?
Hear me out before you leave this page, there are so many people laying next to their mate thinking of someone else. They are pondering over the one that got away. The very things they are doing for their new mate could be compensation for the areas that lacked in the previous relationship.
For instance, I know someone that built a house for their second wife because they wished they were able to do that for their first wife. There are some men that have shared they treat their mate a certain way to make up for how they treated their ex. In a way, your ex has learned from their mistakes but since the bridge is burned, scrapped, and discarded with you, they find a way to absolve their shitty behavior by correcting their actions in the next relationship.
Oftentimes, I have heard people stay in a bad relationship to block the next person from benefiting from the time and effort they invested in their mate. With this in mind, why would it be far-fetched for your ex to be more motivated or mature when they move on. All of that nagging and pushing did inevitably help them evolve and grow and as we get older we learn and do better. The same person you dated in your early 20s would of course shed the nonsense in their 30s because now maybe they are ready to settle down. With this in mind, could it mean that maybe the timing you two could have been on separate pages when dating?
Even when you have moved on with a better mate, there is still a slight disdain when witnessing your ex being wonderful. Instead of feeling envious, you should pat yourself on the back because most likely YOU DID THAT! On the flip side, your ex has helped you evolve in certain ways if nothing but learning how to set boundaries for yourself.
What are your thoughts on this? Do you believe your hard work with your ex has helped them be more successful in their new relationship?